The Dead Past
by JoJo1
Summary: How did the authorities really get hold of Logan to make those alterations to him?


Archiving: Dolphin Haven, otherwise please ask.  
Disclaimer: Nope, not mine today either. And I'm quite sure I could hear a collective sigh of relief from somewhere...  
Feedback: Sure, bring it on. Flames will be thrown back into the face of the flamer, just so you know...  
Authors notes: Well, this one is sorta an answer to all of those stories that portrays Logan as a pedophile and that's his only reason for wanting Marie. I so cannot see Logan as a pedophile so it was just screaming for something that corrected that.  
Timeline: Set after the movie. For this story's purposes, the movie takes place in 2010.  
Many thanks: To Autumn for betaing this and saying it didn't suck.  
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Logan woke up with a start, panting and he was feeling cold. So much in fact that it made him  
shiver.  
  
And he didn't understand it. Not one bit. His nightmares were a lot less frequent these days  
and more often than not he could sleep a whole night through, much thanks to the beautiful  
woman he shared his bed with. The woman that had made his life whole.  
  
Or that was how it had been until last week. Then the nightmares had reappeared with  
full strength. No, more than full strength actually. But it wasn't the same old nightmares,  
which he would have prefered to tell the truth. Those he at least understood. These ones  
were, apart from being scary, just plain confusing.  
  
Upon waking up, the only parts he could remember was an old mansion on a hilll, a naked 14-year old girl and a  
dark, faceless figure looming in the shadows just outside his range of vision.  
  
But if he was completely honest with himself, he knew what the nightmare was about. The same reason  
that he had stayed away from the mansion for five years after he found out about his past. The  
file he had found had plainly shown in graphic detail that he had been a sick bastard  
that loved to fuck little girls and he had just been too scared to go back. The last thing that he had  
wanted to do was to go back and hurt Marie in any way. He did go back eventually, well got his ass dragged  
back by a grown up Marie when she was sick and tired of waiting but still, and was proved wrong.  
The kids annoyed him exactly the same way they had always done in the now 20 years he could remember  
so even if he had been attracted to them that way before he was another man now.  
  
He knew all that. What he didn't understand was why he all of a sudden had started having nightmares  
about a past that could be 30 or 40 years back, a past that should be dead and buried by now.  
  
Only one thing to do, as much as it pained him to do so. He needed to ask for help. He had always felt  
and known that he could kick just about everyone's butt but he needed to see the butt to be kicked  
for that to be an efficient strategy.  
  
The Professor, Jean and Hank working together may come up with a way to dig up whatever it was his  
subconscious was trying to tell him. At least it was worth a shot since he was so fed up with  
living like this. If it hadn't been for his healing-factor he seriously believed that he would have been  
dead from fatigue by now.  
  
He knew it was pointless in trying to fall asleep again, as it always was when a nightmare woke him  
up, so he did what he always did during his insomniac times: went to sit on one of the benches in  
his favourite part of the garden, nursing a couple of beers and enjoying a smoke. It never failed to calm  
him down and also gave him a lot of time to think. Whenever the rest of the mansion's inhabitants  
started to wake up and make their presences known Logan was always astounded, wondering where the  
hell all the hours disappeared to and this time was no different.  
  
  
As soon as he knew that the Professor was surely awake and in his office he made his way over  
there and knocked on the door.  
  
"Come in Logan"  
  
"Good morning Chuck."  
  
The Professor had finally gotten used to Logan's tendency to give everyone a nickname or two  
and quite frankly, he had started to like it. It was nice being seen as something more than  
just some authority figure every once in a while.  
  
"Good morning Logan. Anything I can do for you?"  
"Yeah, yeah there is. I need some help. Dunno if you're able to help though."  
"I will certainly do what I can, so what is it?"  
  
"Well, my nightmares are resurfacing again. Another nightmare this time. One  
I think is about what happened to me before I was in the lab, and it is taking its  
toll. I can hardly sleep anymore and am weary to the bone. And to be frank, it's  
completely freaking me out. And I don't get why I'm sorta starting to remember it now."  
  
The Professor looks at Logan thoughtfully before answering.  
  
"Hank and I, maybe Jean too, can try but there are no promises. Hank's developed a new sort  
of drug that is a first rate relaxing agent, which you know we will need if I'm  
going to be able to bypass your instinctive need to block out telepaths. That won't be a  
problem will it?"  
"No. I just want to know. When can we do this?"  
"Immediately if you want to."  
"Yes."  
"Let's get down to the medlab and see Hank then".  
  
About half an hour later Logan was lying on a metal table down in the  
medlab, watching the blue and gentle giant preparing two shots of the miracle drug  
as Logan had named it.  
  
"You ready, Logan?" Hank genly asked.  
"Yep. Do your best, or worst maybe".  
  
At that Hank only smiled and gave Logan one shot in each arm. A few minutes  
later the drug started to work and Logan's muscles became more and more relaxed  
and finally so relaxed he wouldn't have been able to move even if his life was  
dependant upon it.  
  
He felt a small stirring in his brain and before he knew it, Chuck was  
further in into his subconscious than ever before.  
  
For a few minutes. Then he fell over, exhausted. Logan could see Hank and  
the Professor exchanging a few words before Hank once again gave Logan two  
shots. Of the antidote this time.  
  
  
"So, did you find anything?" Logan asked when he was in complete control  
over his body again and back up in the Professor's office.  
  
"Not much. This wasn't as effective on your body as on others, no doubt due  
to your healing-factor, so I had to fight to gain access to your subconscious.  
It wasn't a complete failure though. I know where that mansion you were dreaming of is. It  
is located at the border between the United States and Canada, around there" he says,  
pointing to a map. He also scribbles down a few things on a note. "Here's the closest thing  
I could find to an adress. Not a street-name or something like that but descriptions of some  
landmarks close to it and what I think is the closest town. Will you go there to find out more?"  
"Yes. I will just pack a few things and say goodbye to Marie. Thank you, Charles."  
"You're welcome Logan and keep us informed of what's going on will you?"  
"I will, if I can."  
"Of course."  
"Now if you excuse me, I have things to take care of."  
"Certainly. And good luck."  
"Thanks. I have a feeling I will need it" he says before leaving for his room.  
  
He quickly packs just a few necessities, like some food, a map and as much  
clothes he can fit into his duffel bag before he goes in search for Marie.  
  
He finds her in the recreation room, babysitting the newest X-baby. Jubilee  
and Remy's daughter, only four months old and already causing more havoc than every  
other baby combined.  
  
"Marie."  
  
She looks up at him.  
  
"I'm sorry Marie, but I have to leave for a while."  
"But why? I thought you had stopped running away like that."  
"I did too but something has come up."  
  
He stops for a while, contemplating how to say it all, and just keeps  
talking until Marie knows exactly the what he does about the whole mess.  
  
She looks at him sadly before saying "And what will it accomplish trying to find something  
out there? You may not like what you find. Remember last time."  
"I don't know, but it's something I have to do. Can't you see that?"  
"In my mind I can. But not with my heart. I do believe that the present and  
the future is more important than the past. I just wish you could let the past remain  
dead and buried."  
"So do I. So do I."  
"But you can't, can you?"  
"No, not really."  
"Just hurry okay? And call if you can."  
"I will." he says and gives her a very heated goodbye kiss and leaves, not looking back because  
he knows that if he does he won't be able to go.  
  
A few minutes later Marie sees the familiar sight of a motorcycle leaving  
the mansion and says silently to herself "Take care, Logan. And do come back to me."  
  
  
  
Several days later  
  
Logan had slowly but surely looked around the surrounding scenery and sure enough, he had found  
some of the landmarks the Professor had dug out of his brain but still no sign of any mansion.  
But he was absolutely positive that this trip wouldn't be a complete waste of time. The memories  
were starting to come back and he could remember some details from years way back even during  
his waking moments. He didn't know why but he was starting to believe in one thing Hank had  
said during the trip down memory lane:  
  
"You see Logan, whatever happened to you in the past seems to be coming back permanently. I have two  
theories regarding that, depening on exactly what happened. One is that your memory loss is your  
body or your psyche's natural way of coping with a severe trauma and now that your much more at  
peace with yourself that defense-mechanism isn't required anymore. The other possibility is that  
you were, in layman terms, brainwashed and that whoever did it did it poorly so the effects of  
it is starting to wear down."  
  
Logan didn't know which of the theories was right, if any of them, but he sure noticed the signs  
of his memory coming back slowly but surely. For one thing, he now remembered that he had once  
lived in one of the small towns here and he also knew the name of the girl in his memories:  
Lucy. No last name would make itself known yet but he was patient. If had waited at least  
20 years to come this close to knowing his past, he could wait more.  
  
But not for longer than absolutely necessary so he decided to aid his memory for as much as he could.  
Which meant going into town, going through newspaper after newspaper from the timeframe he figured  
it would be, hoping he would see something or someone to drag out even more memories.  
  
  
  
He wasn't sure the town was big enough to have a library or even if they had newspapers that old  
stored away, either in their original paper-form or in digital format but he figured it was at least  
worth a shot.  
  
It turned out he was very lucky and there was indeed a library he could use for his research.  
As the librarian so kindly told him if he had gotten there just a year ago he wouldn't have  
been able to find those old newspapers and articles in the databases. Some things might  
still not be there but most things.  
  
Logan didn't complain though, he was only too happy to have some solid leads  
at last and he got to work. Enthusiastically and without pause for as long as his body  
and mind would allow it he researched. He read issue after issue and year after year of the  
local newspaper. He recognized some smaller things here and there but nothing earth-shattering. When it  
became too much he got himself a few hours of sleep and then back to the terminal again.  
  
At the fourth day slaving away like that he froze. He saw a name in an article he recognized. McKenzie.  
Now why did that name ring a bell? He read the article in question a lot more thoroughly than the  
others but nothing more would surface from his buried memories. He made sure to bookmark the  
article he was reading and started to use the search features instead to see if he could find  
something more regarding this McKenzie.  
  
He did. A lot in fact. George McKenzie, born in 1950. Married to a woman named Mary, name as a girl  
unrevealed, and apparently the richest man in town owning the local sawmill plus some other thriving  
companies but the sawmill was by large his major income.  
He's also being known as one of the beneficiaries of a school and boarding home for orphans, not to  
mention being one of the elected officials of the local government. Logan checked the date of the first  
time his name had been mentioned. 1973, when he inherited the sawmill from his dad. 2 years  
later he got married and his daughter was born in 1978. A daughter named Lucy. The mother died in a planecrash  
two years later.  
  
Logan was shocked, pure and simple. His mind was going on overload and was severly tempted to  
just bring his claws through the computer screen but that wouldn't help him at all.  
  
He used some of the techniques Jean had taught him to gain control back over his emotions  
and left the library for his hotel room before he did something rash. He couldn't afford  
that at this point, before he had figured out what the connection was between him,  
George McKenzie and Lucy McKenzie.  
  
He just lied down on his bed doing his damnest to relax as completely as he could and before  
he knew it he was fast asleep.  
  
The dream returned and once again Logan was thrashing around in his sleep fighting things  
he didn't have much control over. None at all to tell the truth.  
  
He was much relieved when he woke up though and not because it gave him some rest from the  
awful nightmare.  
  
No, because of something much simpler and also a lot more rewarding than that.  
  
He knew. He knew his past.  
  
  
"That bastard! He's so gonna pay for this." was the first thought that ran across  
Logan's mind. Closely followed by "I'm gonna have his guts for breakfast  
if I don't hang him in his own intestines while his belly gets to know the claws  
intimiately." But how? "First things first. Find out where he lives."  
  
Logan's mind was so full of bloodlust and the need for revenge at this point that  
it took him awhile to realize what the easiest way to find that out was but once  
he thought of it he was amazed that it had been so simple.  
  
The phonebook. There was only one McKenzie living in the town and he also was going  
by the name George so it was a no-brainer to figure out it was the same guy.  
  
Logan waited until the middle of the night and then went to the nearest phone and dialed the number he had  
found and waited patiently until someone answered.  
  
"George McKenzie speaking and this better be good."  
Logan very calmly just answered "Surprise!" and could hear a receiver falling to the  
floor on the other end. McKenzie clearly recognized the voice Logan thought with a smug  
look on his face. "Payback's a bitch, isn't it? I hope you've already paid for your  
burial ground!" he said before hanging up on him intending to make him sweat a little before  
gutting him, or maybe something worse.  
  
Logan thought back to the year 1994. He had worked for McKenzie back then.  
One evening he had gone over to McKenzie's mansion, which he now knew where it was, to bring him some  
unsettling news. A choice he very much had come to regret since then. He found out that McKenzie was a  
very sick little man, so much sicker than everything Logan had even contemplated before  
that. He had never thought that the man he worked for was such a perverted swine  
that he could even think about molesting his own daughter. "I was so wrong"  
Logan thought dryly "and both me and Lucy paid the price for it. I caught him  
molesting her that day and I hardly think it was the first time." A bitter laugh  
comes from Logan's throat, if a laugh it is. "Who do you think the courts believed, hub bub?"  
  
  
Logan was enjoying this and was planning to make the most of it. He considered this  
breakthrough of his a once in a lifetime opportunity. Sure, an opportunity he would  
have prefered to not have needed in the first place but he sure as hell would enjoy  
paying back for everything that had been done to him.  
  
Marie had been both right and wrong at the same time. He didn't like what had been done  
to him, but he now knew none of it was his fault. He had been used.  
  
The trial he had been put through had of course led to his conviction as a  
child molestor. McKenzie's word had just been seen as more trustworthy  
thanks to his reputation as being well-meaning and helpful member of the  
community.  
  
And worse, he hadn't been convicted to a ordinary prison. No, he had been  
seen as mentally unstable and had been confined into a sanitarium where  
they continued to keep him drugged out. Well, they had tried to anyway but  
his mutation made that a losing proposition too. That was what brought his existance  
to the authorities attention. The military authorities attention to be precise  
and they soon enough got hold of him from the sanitarium and brought over  
to Alkalai Lake where he was being experimented on.  
  
Both of Hank's theories had been right. It was a traumatic event that made him  
forget most of the things, all the things that had been made to him to make  
sure the adamantium was bonded to his skeleton. And he hadn't escaped from  
the lab as he had once thought. No, he had been released but with all conscious  
thoughts of what had been done to him wiped out from his memory and the faces and  
possible names from his tormentors too. He didn't know why but that little part  
he didn't care about because he had a pretty good idea of why. To see how their  
experiment would perform in society at large.  
  
The compound at Alkali Lake was now deserted and had been for some years so the  
only one left to take revenge on was McKenzie, the one that in Logan's mind  
is the one ultimately responsible for everything.  
  
And even if he wasn't, that didn't stop Logan wanting his liver for breakfast.  
Not literally but this is what he had lived for for many years, to finally  
get his revenge.  
  
  
He let McKenzie sweat for a couple of days, making a phonecall or two a night  
to keep him on his toes. He was feeling a little like a stalker but didn't mind  
that either.  
  
Soon enough that lost its appeal and four nights after the first call to McKenzie  
he went into action. He rode away on his bike towards the mansion and thanks  
to his newly found memories he knew exactly where it was and how to get inside  
undetected. Of course, he couldn't know if the same spot was as unguarded now  
as it was back then but he would soon find out.  
  
Well, the small gate at the back of the huge mansion grounds was still there.  
And still unguarded. A case of McKenzie thinking there's none around to  
be any threat to him anymore? "Well, wrong buddy"  
  
Logan quickly made his way up to the front of the mansion, knowing exactly  
where McKenzie was most likely to be.  
  
True enough, he found him there but the self-confidence Logan now remembered  
him having was not there anymore. He looked like a caged animal wanting to  
get out. He still wasn't aware that Logan was near him but that was about  
to change. Logan wouldn't claw him unawareness, no chance in hell of that  
happening. He still had a lot of honor and that would just be a cheap shot.  
And boring too not to mention having it all end way too quickly.  
  
"Hey Creep" he said out loud and McKenzie immediatly turned around.  
"It really is you. I thought you were dead."  
"Nope. Not that you didn't try. You're the one's that soon's fucking dead." Logan said  
with a *snikt* accompanying the words.  
  
McKenzie almost jumped out of his skin when he saw the claws, "What are those?" he asked  
with a very faint voice. A voice that got fainter and fainter.  
"Your death" Logan said, moving a step closer to him.  
  
McKenzie looked petrified and could not help but staring at Logan's claws. Then all of a  
sudden his face got a pained expression on it and his right hand flew up, clutching  
a part of his chest before falling down.  
  
Logan quickly went over to him, checking the pulse. Dead, apparently by a heart attack.  
"Poetic justice" Logan silently thought while he still feeled cheated out of his revenge.  
  
He left the mansion, trying to figure out what to do now. He didn't come to much  
of a conclusion but he hadn't really expected to either. Not in this short amount  
of time. So he did the next best thing. Went home. To the other mansion. The one  
he could call a home. The one where Marie was waiting for him.  
  
Time to let the past be truly dead. 


End file.
